12 weeks and (form) Letters from the President

I got the kids dressed up to go to the temple on Saturday, but we got there and the temple was closed (N.B. the temple is never closed), but at least we got some cute pics.  I know I sound like a broken record, but they are really getting big.  I just ordered size two diapers, she's over 10 lbs. and he's over 12, so they have now been in four sizes in the last 12 weeks.  My mom is coming to hang out with us for a few days this week while my BIL is still home on paternity leave.  After he goes back to work, we may not be seeing her again for awhile.  She hasn't been here since January when MIL arrived from India.  Having them both here = date night!  Our first since we went to the Hamptons in August.  Needless to say, we are very excited. :)  Having a little freedom may actually get my butt in gear for the ultimate sitter search.

The kids are doing great and are only getting up once at night now (~2-3am), when DH and I usually both get up so I can pump and we can feed them both.

We received our WH greetings recently (thanks for the tip M!), though they strangely addressed the envelopes to DH and me, but fun for the baby books none the less.  These mean even more to me since I have met and chatted with our president (at a fundraiser for his Senate run in 2004) and he was elected when I was in my first 2ww on this crazy journey...

The big news is I'm starting to get some feeling back in my hands!  I can't tell you how good this feels.  I'm not sure whether it's just a function of time (it has been nearly three months now...) or if the acu is actually helping.  She started out just working generally on my hands, but the last few weeks she's been pulling out the big guns.  She's been doing moxa for awhile now, where she applies heat to the needles in my hands.  And then she went for needles in the tips of my fingers, which is as bad as it sounds, but showed us I did have some feeling deep down in there afterall.  Ouch.  Then last week, she "bled" my fingers, which is almost as bad as it sounds, where she pricks the tips, getting a drop or so to get things going.  Sounds very weird, I know.  But you get desperate after so long and I trust her completely after over two years.  I will probably only continue to go to see her until the rest of my prepaid sessions are up in a few more weeks.

My MIL is helpful during the day and does a lot of cooking.  It is pretty standard in Indian families for the parents/inlaws to come and stay for at least six months.  Sadly for us, my MIL is here alone as my FIL passed away suddenly when we were getting ready to do IVF in late 2010 and yet again my BIL is not able to get a visa (he missed our wedding here as well). 

Besides being really sad for all of us, on a practical note given her very limited English, the fact that she doesn't drive, and her difficulty with our advanced project management system we have in place (deciding how much formula to offer when the BM is gone, charting, etc.), she is an effective mother's helper and soother, but I don't leave her home alone with them.  My FIL used to be our translator and DH does when he is home.  So I go out to run errands, if I must, when DH gets home from work and on the weekends.  But we spend our days in near silence, save the baby chatter that is now filling our home.  Yes I probably should have been learning Hindi or Marahti, in my free time.  I'm a confirmed bad DIL, though she is lovely...

I finally got to reading (the elder) Dr. Weissbluth's, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Twins, which is kind of embarrassing given how quick a read it is.  One of the things that jumped out at me was actually his blurb talking about the connection between hormonal infertility (which seems to be our/my problem getting and even more sadly staying pg) and supply issues.  Makes a lot of sense.  Not that at this point I have serious supply issues (I get ~ 35 oz/day), but it's too little for two and I wouldn't feel comfortable trying to switch back to the breast unless I was getting more than they now eat from pumping/supplementing.  I had guilt for about two seconds about supplementing, since they are getting the vast majority of their feeds from breast milk, and pumping/bottle feeding works well for us given all the people who are here to feed them.  It also means we'll have no issues going to formula and bottles later.  And they've been disadvantaged enough by my body's inability to do what it is supposed to, I had/have no intention of starving them too, even though and especially since they are now growing so well.  I'm not that much of a purist and they are thriving. 

I also think I've pretty much bagged the idea of cloth diapering.  It just has about zero appeal to me now, though I guess that could change.  I chalk it up to being a casualty of multiples, since I thought I would want to.  Seventh Gen diapers are really nice and they haven't had any bottom issues, yet.

My sister got home from the hospital in time for her birthday last month, and it turns out that it was actually a really bad staph infection.  Thanks for all your prayers!
Next up, getting the kids pics done for three months (next week!) and filling up their Easter baskets, which I got from Pottery Barn Kids (Peacocks and Plaid!).  I see more Jellycats in our future... :)  The Easter bunny comes to our clubhouse on April 1st.

Two month well baby/nine weeks old (on Mardi Gras!)

After going to the pediatrician at one, two, and three weeks old (when Mari finally surpassed her birth weight), it's been quite awhile now since we've been to see Dr. Dan (son of Marc Weissbluth (of the Healthy Sleep, Happy Baby books), they share a practice with six other MDs) in the city.  It was a great visit, and the kids both checked out "perfect" (his words, not mine).

Alistair is up to 10 lbs. and 2 ozs. and is 22 1/2 inches long.  His head measures 39.5 cm.
Marielle is up to 9 lbs. and 9 ozs. and is 21 3/4 inches long.  Her head measures 38.7 cm.

Nearly all measures are 25-50 percentiles, though they are not adjusted for their birth at 36 1/2 weeks gestation (so they are really closer to one month babies than two) which makes a big difference in their size now, but as time goes by will obviously become increasingly less so.  And as he reminded us today, none of these are indicative of their likely adult size.  That is more likely to be driven by ours.  They have nearly doubled their weights since their release from the hospital on Dec. 24th, when he was 5-2 and she was 5-3, so we are very happy with their growth. :)

They also received all their immunization rounds for two months: Hep B (#2), DTaP, Hib, Polio, Pneumococcal, and Rotavirus.  This practice of one of the first (and now one of many) which does not allow children who do not follow the recommended immunization schedule of the AAP (which is based here) and the CDC in their practice, which continues to stir some controversy apparently.  I didn't realize this when we chose them, though I'm a huge proponent of vaccines, as we just picked them off a list of recommended practices from our OB, as we were not able to interview pediatricians as we planned due to my bed rest. 

They did very well with their immunizations, and fortunately their appointment fell at a feeding time, so we were able to feed them out of the initial pain, get them down and enjoy a nice lunch at the sushi place in the building.  We are set now until their four month in April, hopefully.

They've done a great job meeting their "milestones", smiling, cooing, head control, tracking movements, etc.  They are now sleeping up to 5-6 hours in stretches at night, though I am still not sleeping more than a few hours at a time.  Dr. Dan wants us to get them on a "bedtime" (between 6 and 8pm) to set things up for when they start sleeping through the night and organizing their daytime sleep into naps in the coming weeks and months.

I have to applaud the amount of postpartum depression screening they do now (at the hospital, OB, Pedi, my insurance pg mgmt program, seemingly everywhere), but it is almost comical for me (not that there is anything funny about PPD) as beside some very early nights when I would sit in the nursery holding them and cry at the thought of our good fortune of being entrusted with these amazing little people, I have honestly never been more content than in the last two months.

Since the twins are getting mostly breastmilk, now that they are two months old, we are to start giving them vitamin D supplements, which we will start this week.  Alistair's hip ultrasound that we had done at six weeks came back normal, thank goodness.  They are now officially out of their newborn clothes an on to their three months as of this week. 

Now that we have ordered and received the twins' birth certificates and social security numbers, we have set off on getting them established as real people in the world.  They now have 529s in their names, rather than just in mine, bank accounts for all those gifts, and we will get them passports soon.  I think we may end up going to India for their first birthdays.

Thoughts and prayers for my sister Emily, as she is now been hospitalized with severe mastitis after giving birth less than two weeks ago.  Baby Abby and her husband Joe are with her there and my mother is watching her three older kids.  Hopefully she will be able to go home soon, as they are pumping her full of antibiotics given her WBC count is crazy high.  She needs to avoid going septic, which is nothing to mess around with.  Her 39th birthday is this Friday.

Eight weeks (on Valentine's Day!)

The babies are getting so big!  Here they are this week modeling their new Hanna Andersson jammies (which they promptly spit up all over)

I have no idea how reliable my measurements are of them (I got a digital scale where I weigh me with and without them in my arms), but they are pushing double digits (as in ten pounds!) and have grown inches since we last had them to the pediatrician.  We go back for their two month visit on Monday for the first time since she got cleared for surpassing her birth weight (at three weeks).  I am so excited!  My teeny tiny babies are no longer so teeny tiny.  He is significantly bigger than her now, just like he always was on the inside, until he went breech.

They are smiling and laughing and are so much more interactive now.  It is so fun to see them come into their little personalities.  They are extremely patient with me when I decide it's time to take their picture.

My step-mother (who is retired from her family's library foundation) got me a pre-release copy of the new book, Bringing up Bebe by Pamela Druckerman, at the recent book convention in New Orleans.  In the UK, it was released as, Why French children don't throw food.  Even though I have basically zero time to read now, and have yet to touch a single book on parenting, I am devouring it.  It is really funny besides being an insightful look at just how dysfunctional most American parenting tendencies are.  Who knew we were so European already?  Well, we did.  I highly recommend it.

She also got us a cute children's book called Chopsticks by Amy Krouse Rosenthal.  It is about how the chopsticks always do everything together, but when one gets hurt and has to stay in bed, the other goes out and learns about all the things that he can do by himself.  A very cute book for twins who need to learn about being their own people apart from each other.

It still seems so far off, but I am itching for summer like something awful.  And seeing this cuteness from Pottery Barn Kids has me debating babies at the beach, oui or non?  We shall see...  At least cover them up!

Our new niece finally arrived last week (a few days late, like all her brothers and sister).  Welcome to the world Abigail! :)
Happy Valentine's Day!! :)

Adventures in cerclage removal

At long last... (I wrote and never posted this just before we had the twins)

The Friday of my scheduled cerclage removal was another interesting day. Our appt. was scheduled for 10:30am @ Prentice, so I couldn't eat or drink anything after 5am (in case I started progressing with the cerc out and needed to go directly to the OR for my epidural and section), and thankfully we got up early and had breakfast before we left. Well, of course things didn't quite go as planned.

We checked into OB triage on time and were sent upstairs to L&D. I should have known from all the people in the waiting room that they were a bit busier than normal. They came by about 11 and told us that they had so many people come in that morning in labor that all the rooms were full, and that they'd have to send us (and other electives) away and let us know later when (that afternoon or on the next Monday) they'd be able to accommodate us. Since we were already there (and my mom was halfway there from WI) we went down to the lobby to hang out.

About a half hour later the OB director, who'd given me her card to call later to check in, called my cell and told us to go back to triage and they would just do the procedure there. So we went back to triage and waited a bit. And then got a room and waited some more. Finally, by early afternoon two of the OB's from my practice attempted to find and remove my cerclage, to no avail. It was apparently difficult surgery, I recently heard from my OB, and it seemed that part of the stitch had since pulled through even with me on strict bed rest for 16 weeks. They could not find it and they could not get it out. All this while, I'm writhing in pain with their attempts. So when they decide that they will not be able to do it there (or without anesthetic, as planned) we have to wait for a room upstairs. They finally gave me an IV at this point, as I was about seven hrs w/o fluids by 2pm.

We finally got a room upstairs and they got me hooked up to the monitors again. I was contracting pretty much all day, though I didn't feel anything.  I'm apparently the queen of silent contractions.  They decided to give me an epidural line, rather than just a spinal like I'd gotten when they gave me the stitch, as everyone wanted to be ready to go right to a section, if I progressed after the cerc was out. Anesthesia took forever and there was yet another change in OB's (I saw four of the eight from my practice over less than eight hrs), so it was 6pm by the time the epi was in and then came the procedure. I couldn't feel a thing, thank goodness, and they finally got it out. Immediately following, I was about 1 1/2 cm dilated, and then an hour later, I was back up to two. They continued to check me until 10pm and I was still two, so they discharged me.  I was then able to eat and drink finally after some 17 hours of neither.
.. 
We spent the night in the city, just in case. But by mid-day Saturday, it seemed that things weren't really changing, so I opted to go home instead of staying in the city.  After that I didn't have any contrax (that I know of), my bleeding subsided, and besides just being in general pain and discomfort, not sure if we are progressing or not.  Go back to OB on Tuesday to see how things are looking...

Six weeks post partum and self care

I had my six week CS/post partum OB check up yesterday.  I took the kids with me to meet everyone, which was my first trip out with them alone.  It was a blast, and they were a big hit.  All is well, and now I have clearance to actually do some exercise.  I can't say it's my top priority right now, but I am eager to try to get my body into some sort of functional shape, since I'm still struggling physically after four months of bed rest and major surgery.  So I will have to get reacquainted with our home gym. 

I'm not counting on losing my last few pounds of pregnancy weight until after I stop breastfeeding, which is a long way off, so the goal is to just get stronger and not ache quite so much.  I have also started back to weekly acupuncture, primarily in hopes of finally kicking my post partum carpal tunnel which is still plaguing me and causing numbness in both hands.  I've also started back with regular massages, and hope to get back to the chiropractor soon.  If any of your know how to beat post partum hemorrhoids, let me know...  ;)

My waist is back, but starting a few inches below my belly button it gets pretty scary.  My CS incision healed well, but the stretch marks, oh the stretch marks.  DH calls them the finger lakes (which they resemble) but only if they were in Minnesota (land of 10K).  Mom keeps curiously asking me if they are fading, which they aren't yet, since she never got any.  But I would take them over my sister's diastasis any day, and twice on Sunday.  She's due with #4 next Monday BTW.  We're looking forward to meeting our new niece this spring.

This fussy kid goes completely catatonic in the Snugli.  Best.gift.ever.

I've been out walking with the kids a few times since it's been so warm this winter and one of my (albeit low bar) fitness goals for the year is to do a few 5K's with them this spring through fall, though we'll likely be walking.  We are looking forward to participating in this summer's inaugural Cade Foundation's Race for the Family in the nearby Busse Woods (a gem of the NW suburbs).

The kids are growing like weeds.  Like seven and approaching eight pound weeds.  Can't wait for their two month check-up/weigh in on the 20th.  They are really filling out and pushing the limits on some of their newborn clothes, which will be interesting given their three month clothes are still huge.  I'm still pumping and supplementing given my supply is sporadic.  They've taken every kind of formula we've tried, but we've switched from liquid to powder and have settled on Similac Organic.  I pump every four hours every day, and get anywhere from three to eight ounces each time, but usually about six.  Plenty for one baby, but not enough to ensure that both are getting enough consistently, especially as we increase their feeding size and decrease the frequency.

Alistair

Marielle

Nothing compares to those chubby baby cheeks...

Even though I'm no longer feeding them at the breast, due to Mari's scary weight loss while we were in the hospital (and flashbacks to my eldest nephew's skinny little body), as much as I wanted to, breastfeeding is what everyone says it is.  Challenging.  But someone recently told me breastfeeding multiples successfully is probably the most difficult thing you will ever do (I'd challenge them on that, but anyway...), so I remind myself of this when I feel like it would easier to just give them all formula (which they like just fine) and regain the hours of each day pumping and my body generally (and avoid the pain and discomfort).  My reasoning behind staying home with them full time for the first year is that on top of it being a key period developmentally, it was also important to me not have anything that impeded BFing for this time period (I can't imagine pumping enough at work, which was always my original plan).  It would be way too easy to just quit.

DH wants us to hire a night nurse, which I'm still struggling with.  I'm not sure why.  I'd certainly like to get more sleep, though I'd still get up to pump, but I guess I'm torn.  Like it undermines our ability to take care of our babies.  Insane, I know.  I think we'll go a few more weeks and see how things go.  They both slept nearly six hour stretches last night, not that we slept that much, so we may be turning a corner.  I guess I'm just too practical and would rather spend the money on a new kitchen honestly.  We finally got our new Bosch dishwasher, which I'm completely in love with, and I think it has renewed my appetite for finally replacing the cabinets and counters.  We've already earmarked our first joint tax refund ever ($6K) for the kids' 529 accounts.

One month birthday

The twins turned one month old today (bye bye neonates!) and we celebrated with some pics, an unofficial at home weigh in and measure, and some cupcakes (for us, not them, sorry guys).

They are both growing so fast, adding inches and pounds since we came home less than four weeks ago.  He is now bigger than her by an inch or so and several ounces by our estimation.  They were both over seven pounds by their EDD.

This pretty much sums up their personalities so far.  He fusses and she chills...  She must be thinking...  What is wrong with this kid?

And we're losing it...

Total meltdown...

Wham!

A rare quiet moment...

Happy one month birthday babies!



Some gifts all around...

More Jellycats for the babes...

And a new breast pump for me.  When I bought my Pump in Style Advanced metro bag nearly four years ago, it was the top pump that Medela made.  Not long into pumping, I realized that being tied down would not work.  So I got the Freestyle, which makes all the difference in the world.  Worth.every.penny.  I am pumping about a half dozen times a day and getting almost enough for both babies right now, though we are still (and will continue to be) supplementing.  Thankfully, they don't seem to care.

Less than a week ago, it was over 50 degrees (yes, they are overdressed) and we were out for our first walk in the City Mini in the neighborhood...

Now, we have about a foot of snow and it's 10 degrees...

And just over a month ago, I was wondering how much longer I'd be pregnant...  Oh boy, was I miserable...

Glad we're not going back there again...

Three weeks old

My oh my, how the time does fly... I can't believe the twins are three weeks old already and clearly I'm not going to be much of a mommy blogger (heavy on the mommy, easy on the blogger, sorry guys). We are settling into a routine at home, even though we still continue to fine tune as we figure them out.

At their three week appt. today, they are now up to 6-9 (Alistair) and 6-7 (Marielle). 
At two weeks, they were 5-15 (A) and 5-12 (M), which had him surpassing her for the first time. 
At one week, they were 5-6 (A) and 5-7 (M)
At discharge @ 4 days old: they were 5-2 (A) and 5-3 (M) (Mari's dramatic 14% unexplained weight loss in day one is why I have been pumping and supplementing since the hospital- never say never, right?).
At birth:  they were 5-7 (A) and 6-1 (M)

We and our awesome pediatrician (which we go all the way to the city to see each week, call us crazy) are happy with their weight gains.  They absolutely love to eat, especially little Alistair.  It was so nice out after our appt. today that they got to take their first walk along the Lake.  They slept through it, but it sure was nice to get outside.  One more day of 50-something weather until winter sets in for real.

We are pretty sure his size and weight (not to mention his general comfort) was compromised by being breech for the last ten plus weeks of their gestation, as he had been measuring ahead until then. Poor little guy. This also gets him a ticket to Children's for a routine hip u/s @ 6 wks, though they say he is fine. Hip dysplasia from being breech is a more common issue for girls apparently. They either both stopped growing in utero, or less likely our u/s estimates up to and including 35 wks were way off. Both that he was just an ounce under the cut off for LBW and her weight loss obviously concerned us, but they are both very healthy so far, which is what is important. Small, but mighty they are.

When I first started trying to feed them at the breast, our little guy would work so hard, but pretty much just ended up nibbling on my nips. Not so great. Mari had a little better latch, since she had a bigger mouth, but she'd just fall asleep. Our little sleeping beauty.  But then all bets were off when we needed to make sure they were both getting enough to eat, since my colostrum apparently wasn't cutting it and my milk came in on day 3.  Thankfully, I've been able to produce the vast majority of what they are now eating.  I think most of the remaining ten pounds (of ~50 by the end) I'm carrying around is in my boobs.

My mother has been here helping off and on since they arrived (albeit with limited helpfulness), and she will go again as my dad and step-mother are coming this weekend.  MIL arrives from India on the 22nd and will likely stay until summer.  As challenging as it is to have house guests now, I've bought into the "don't turn down free help" mantra, which sadly is needed given the fact that I am still far from 100% now.  I'm feeling much better now, but a CS recovery is pretty stark, which I guess makes sense when you realize they've cut you right where almost all movement starts from.  It takes a few weeks to feel anything more than completely useless.  DH is starting to go back to the office now for meetings, but he will work from home until his mom comes.

I have also ironically developed a nasty case of carpal tunnel post-pregnancy, for which I'm seeing a hand doctor next week.  Since I've already been icing, wearing braces, and taking anti-inflammatories to no avail, and my thumb and first two fingers on both hands are numb, I'll be potentially looking at cortizone injections, but we'll see what he has to say.  It's another one of those things that when you hear about someone having seems like not such a big deal (kinda like bed rest), but let me tell you it's not cool to have something like this that makes it so much more difficult and painful to take care of your children.

Mari is so very animated, she puts on little shows with all her faces and like I said she absolutely loves to sleep.  She is more alert now that they are outgrowing their pre-termness (their EDD is later this week), but I think she will be a sleeper like her mom.  We sometimes have to wake her to eat. Alistair is our not so little anymore guy, though he still has that scared look on his face, even though I always talk to him and tell him that he doesn't need to worry.  The kid has a furrowed brow already.  Guess who got my anxiety?  They both love being read to and do lots of neck exercising and hold up their little heads and are getting more used to tummy time.  They are pretty tolerant of bath time and we've also introduced pacifiers, which is very helpful for him especially.  They are now next door in their nursery in their own cribs instead of in the PNP.

Showing off their matching outfits...

They are now out of preemie diapers, since their cord stumps are long gone and are working their way into larger newborn clothes.  My mom went out and bought them smaller ones, since the ones we had they were absolutely swimming in at first.

Our announcements are coming tomorrow and I can't wait to see them and get them sent out.  The proof was perfect, I am so happy with how they turned out.

I know I still need to post on their nursery, which is finally done, but now in full use.  Hope to get the pics up soon.  We are both loving our new life and I've never been happier.  Life is good.  :)